120+ Pumpkin Puns: Jokes And One-Liners

Pumpkins are more than just a staple of fall decor; they’re also a rich source of humor! Whether you’re carving them into jack-o’-lanterns or whipping them up into pumpkin pie, these orange orbs provide plenty of fodder for laughter.

Get ready to giggle your way through this collection of pumpkin-themed puns, jokes, and one-liners. With over 120 quips to choose from, you’ll be the reigning monarch of pumpkin humor in no time!

40 Funny Pumpkin Puns

Why was the pumpkin so stressed out? It had too much squash!
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite sport? Squash.
How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!
Why did the pumpkin pie go to a dentist? It needed a filling!
What do you get when you drop a pumpkin? Squash.
Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch all night? It wanted to be a jack-o’-lantern.
What did the pumpkin say to the pumpkin carver? Cut it out!
How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!
What do you call a pumpkin that’s terrible at baseball? A squasher.
Why did the pumpkin cross the road? To prove it wasn’t chicken!
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite movie? Pulp Fiction.
Why did the pumpkin break up with its girlfriend? It was tired of being in the same patch.
How do you unlock a pumpkin’s door? With a pumpkin key.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite dance move? The squash.
Why did the pumpkin go to college? It wanted to be well-rounded.
What do you call a pumpkin with a suntan? A baked potato.
Why did the pumpkin go to the doctor? It had a bad case of the gourd.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite plant? A squash.
Why was the pumpkin afraid to jump in the water? It was scared of becoming a squash.
How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch.
What did the pumpkin say to the pie? You’re crusty.
Why did the pumpkin pie go to school? To be desserted.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite time of year? Fall, of course!
Why did the pumpkin sit on a fence? To keep the squash in.
How do you make a pumpkin laugh? Tickle its funny bone.
What do you call a pumpkin comedian? A pun-kin!
Why was the pumpkin so rude? It was a little seedy.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite exercise? Squats.
How do you make a pumpkin spice latte? Stir it a little.
Why did the pumpkin refuse to fight? It didn’t want to squash the competition.
What do you call a pumpkin that likes to bowl? A strike-o’-lantern.
Why did the pumpkin go to the party? It heard they were bobbing for apples.
How do you know if a pumpkin is going to be a star? It’s always in the limelight.
Why did the pumpkin go to the gym? It wanted to get jacked-o’-lantern.
What do you call a pumpkin who overdoes it on Halloween? A gourdian angel.
Why did the pumpkin run away and get married? It didn’t want to be left on the shelf.
How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite TV show? The Walking Gourd.
Why was the pumpkin so sad? It had a lot of emotional baggage.
What did the pumpkin say to the pumpkin carver? Cut it out!

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40 Funny Pumpkin Jokes

Why was the pumpkin upset? It didn’t get a pie-ment.
What do you call a pumpkin that’s been dumped? Squash.
Why did the pumpkin go to the doctor? It had a bad case of the gourd.
How does a pumpkin listen to music? With its pumpkin patch!
Why did the pumpkin cross the road? To prove it wasn’t chicken!
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite holiday? Halloween, of course!
How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!
What do you call a pumpkin who works at a hospital? A squash surgeon.
Why did the pumpkin go to the beach? It wanted to get a little sun.
How do you know if a pumpkin is going to be a star? It’s always in the limelight.
What do you call a pumpkin who likes to bowl? A strike-o’-lantern.
Why did the pumpkin go to the party? It heard they were bobbing for apples.
How do you make a pumpkin laugh? Tickle its funny bone.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite instrument? The trom-bone.
Why did the pumpkin run away and get married? It didn’t want to be left on the shelf.
How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch.
What did the pumpkin say to the pumpkin carver? Cut it out!
Why was the pumpkin so rude? It was a little seedy.
How do you make a pumpkin spice latte? Stir it a little.
Why did the pumpkin refuse to fight? It didn’t want to squash the competition.
What do you call a pumpkin that likes to play soccer? A kick-o’-lantern.
Why was the pumpkin so sad? It had a lot of emotional baggage.
How do you unlock a pumpkin’s door? With a pumpkin key.
What did the pumpkin say to the pie? You’re crusty.
Why did the pumpkin pie go to school? To be desserted.
How do you mend a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch.
Why was the pumpkin afraid to jump in the water? It was scared of becoming a squash.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite dance move? The squash.
How do you make a pumpkin pie? You ‘pump’-kin it full of love!
Why did the pumpkin sit on a fence? To keep the squash in.
What do you call a pumpkin who overdoes it on Halloween? A gourdian angel.
Why did the pumpkin go to the gym? It wanted to get jacked-o’-lantern.
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite TV show? The Walking Gourd.
Why did the pumpkin go to college? It wanted to be well-rounded.
How do you make a pumpkin giggle? Tickle its funny bone!
Why was the pumpkin pie so outgoing? Because it was never crust-y around strangers!
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite superhero? The Squash!
Why did the pumpkin become an astronaut? It wanted to explore space beyond the patch!
How do you fix a broken pumpkin? With a pumpkin patch!
What’s a pumpkin’s favorite type of ship? The “ship” question seems to have been cut off. Let’s continue with the last joke and proceed with the next section.

Read More: Pumpkin Pie Puns, Jokes And One-Liners

40 Funny Pumpkin One-Liners

I’m just here for the boos… and the pumpkins.
You’re the pumpkin spice to my life.
Orange you glad I didn’t say banana? Oh wait, we’re talking about pumpkins!
Don’t be a gourd-geous pumpkin; be yourself!
You’re smashing, just like a pumpkin!
Let’s carve out some time for pumpkin picking.
Pumpkin spice and everything nice—that’s what autumn’s made of.
I’m so corny; I could be a pumpkin.
I’m on the pumpkin diet. I see pumpkins, I eat them.
Life’s too short not to indulge in pumpkin pie.
I’m not afraid of ghosts; I’m afraid of running out of pumpkin spice.
I’m not lazy; I’m just in a pumpkin spice coma.
Pumpkin spice makes everything nice—except for my waistline.
You’re the cream to my pumpkin pie.
I like my pumpkins how I like my jokes—punny!
Pumpkin spice latte: the unofficial drink of basic witches everywhere.
I’m just a pumpkin spice girl, living in a pumpkin spice world.
If you were a pumpkin, you’d be a great pumpkin.
Forget diamonds; pumpkins are a girl’s best friend.
Pumpkin spice and everything nice—except for Mondays.
Why did Cinderella get kicked off the soccer team? She kept turning into a pumpkin!
Don’t be a pumpkin; be a jack-o’-lantern!
Pumpkin spice makes everything nice—even Monday mornings.
You’re so sweet; you must be made of pumpkin pie.
You’re my pumpkin in a patch full of squash.
Let’s pumpkin spice up our lives!
Why was the pumpkin afraid to cross the road? It had no guts.
Pumpkin spice makes everything nice—except for traffic jams.
You’re the spice to my pumpkin.
I’m not just any pumpkin; I’m the pick of the patch!
Pumpkin spice latte: because adulting is hard.
You’re the pumpkin to my pie.
Pumpkin spice and everything nice—except for my bank account.
I’m not basic; I’m seasonally festive!
Why did the pumpkin sit on the porch? It wanted to be a jack-o’-lantern when it grew up.
Pumpkin spice: the scent of autumn and procrastination.
You’re the pumpkin to my spice.
Life’s too short to say no to pumpkin spice.
I’m a sucker for pumpkin spice and everything nice.
You’re so fly, you must be on a broomstick!

Conclusion

Pumpkins aren’t just for decorating or making pies; they’re also super funny! You can carve them, cook them, or just laugh at them with these jokes, puns, and one-liners. There are so many to choose from—over 120! Whether you like silly puns, clever jokes, or short one-liners, there’s something here to make you smile. So next time you’re in need of a laugh, grab a pumpkin and enjoy the humor that comes with it!

Pumpkins bring more than just flavor and decoration—they bring laughter too! With a wide array of jokes, puns, and one-liners, there’s no shortage of pumpkin-themed humor to enjoy. So, embrace the fun and share these quips with friends and family for a good chuckle. After all, laughter is the best seasoning for any pumpkin dish!